Funny Jokes – Clean Jokes – Joke of The Day

Archive for the ‘Funny Jokes List V’ Category

Ventriliquist cowboy walks into town and sees Indian sitting on his porch.Cowboy: Hey, cool dog. Mind if I speak to him?Indian: Dog no talk.Cowboy: Hey dog, hows it going?Dog: Doin alright.Indian: [extreme look of shock]Cowboy: Is this your owner? [pointing at Indian]Dog: YepCowboy: How’s he treat you?Dog: Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food, and takes meto the lake once a week to play.Indian: [look of disbelief]Cowboy: Mind if I talk to your horse?Indian: Horse no talk.Cowboy: Hey horse, how’s it going?Horse: Cool.Indian: [extremer look of shock]Cowboy: Is this your owner? [pointing at Indian]Horse: YepCowboy: How’s he treat you?Horse: Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes medown often, and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements.Indian: [total look of amazement]Cowboy: Mind if I talk to your sheep?Indian: Sheep Lie!!
Category:Practical Jokes

|DURING a readiness exercise, my friend Jim and I, Air Force security policemen, were guarding entry to a bunker-like structure where aircrafts were kept.When a pilot about to do a preflight check approached without his identification in plain view, Jim asked him for it.”I don’t see why I have to show you my ID,” the pilot snapped. “After all, it is my plane.”"Sir, with all due respect, it may be your plane,” replied Jim, “but it’s sitting in my garage!”
Category:Military Jokes

|Rush Limbaugh and his chauffeur were out driving in the country and accidentally hit and killed a pig that had wandered out on a country road. Limbaugh told the chauffeur to drive up to the farm and apologize to the farmer. They drove up to the farm, the chauffeur got out and knocked on the front door and was let in. He was in there for what seemed like hours. When the chauffeur came out, Limbaugh was confused about why his driver had been in there so long. “Well, first the farmer shook my hand, then he offered me a beer, then his wife brought me some cookies, and his daughter showered me with kisses.” explained the driver. “What did you tell the farmer?” Limbaugh asked. The chauffeur replied, “I told him I was Rush Limbaugh’s driver and I’d just killed the pig.”
Category:Free Jokes

|A farmer and his brand new bride were riding home from the chapel in a wagon pulled by a team of horses, when the older horse stumbled.The farmer said, “That’s once.”A little further along, the poor old horse stumbled again.The farmer said, “That’s twice.”After a little, while the poor old horse stumbled again.The farmer didn’t say anything, but reached under the seat, pulled out a shotgun and shot the horse.His brand new bride yelled, telling him, “That was an awful thing to do.”The farmer said, “That’s once.”
Category:Free Jokes

|Two robbers were robbing a hotel. The first one said, “I hear sirens. Jump!”The second one said, “But we’re on the 13th floor!”The first one screamed back, “This is no time to be superstitious.”
Category:Police Jokes