Funny Jokes – Clean Jokes – Joke of The Day

Archive for the ‘Funny Jokes List W’ Category

One day a kid asks his mom if he can take a shower with her. She says, “Sure son, but don’t look up and don’t look down.”So they’re taking a shower and the kid reaches up for the soap and he says, “Woo mama! What are those?”She says, “Those are my headlights.” The kid says “Ahh.”Then he drops the soap and bends down to get it and he says, “Woo mama! What is that?” and she replies back with, “That is my garage.” The kid says “Ahh.”The next day he asks his dad if he can take a shower with him. The kid does. As he’s scrubbing himself with the soap,he drops it. When he picks it up he says, “Woo daddy! What is that?” The father replies back, “That’s my limousine.”That night he asks his parents if he could sleep with them and they say, “Sure, just don’t look under the covers.”Then in the middle of the night he decides to take a peek. And he says “Wooo mama! Look, daddy is parking his limousine in your garage!”
Category:Dirty Jokes

What’s an Australian kiss?The same thing as a French kiss, only down under!
Category:Dirty Jokes

I was sitting in the waiting room of the hospital after my wife had gone into labor and the nurse walked out and said to the man sitting next to me, “Congratulations sir, you?re the new father of twins!”The man replied, “How about that, I work for the Doublemint Chewing Gum Company.” The man then followed the woman to his wife?s room.About an hour later, the same nurse entered the waiting room and announced that Mr. Smith?s wife has just had triplets.Mr. Smith stood up and said, “Well, how do ya like that, I work for the 3M Company.”The gentleman that was sitting next to me then got up and started to leave. When I asked him why he was leaving, he remarked, “I think I need a breath of fresh air.” The man continued, “I work for 7-UP.”
Category:Doctor Jokes

Why did the nurse go to art school?Answer: To learn how to draw blood!
Category:Doctor Jokes

A guy walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to the counter and says, “Hi . . You know, I just HATE drawing welfare I’d really rather have a job.” The social worker behind the counter says, “Your timing is excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur / bodyguard for his 18-year-old nymphomaniac daughter. You’ll have to drive around in his Mercedes, and he’ll supply all of your clothes. Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You’ll be expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips. You’ll have an adjoining room. The starting salary is $200,000 a year.” The guy says, “You’re bullshitting me!” The social worker says, “Yeah, well, you started it.”
Category:Funny Jokes